Main aur karamjali mombattiyan

I want to share my dukh-bhari story. Let me begin by saying I live in a weird household. Nobody smokes in our family but we have a lighter in the house. Everybody loves candles but no one ever thought of buying a candle lighter. As we all know I do soak-up-my-melancholy-in-the-bathtub wala crap very often. I thought of lighting candles to create a poetic ambience. I mean I was all set. Bas 2-4 Gulzar Sahab level wali shayari pakki thi. Par luck ne saath aaj tak nahi diya, to kal kyun chamatkar hota?

I spent, beep-beep-beep, 10 minutes but no, I couldn’t produce one tiny spark from that lighter. That time mujhe maachis aur maachis wali poetry ki badi yaad aayi. Yeh wali - तुम माचिस की डिबिया पे अपना नाम लिख दो, कम्बख़त बिन जले ही आग लगा देगी! Seriously, never underestimate the power of maachis or the usefulness of a guy who smokes and can light a lighter. Anyway, I did it finally. I was like - you can add fire to words, yeh $8 ki candle kya cheez hai.

My stupidity began the moment I decided to light another candle. But this time I was not up for another 10-minute ritual. I know the time value of money, guys! I took a paper towel, rolled it, lit it from the burning candle to light the second candle. Phir in sultry Rekha ji style I blew the flames off the paper towel. Foooh! And threw it in the dustbin.

I was finally ready to be inspired, write some micro-poetry as I read Poe during the day. Par the fragrance was too smokey for my taste. I felt as if my angst was burning. In a minute, it was so strong, I thought my demons were aflame. It took me few coughs to realize ki ladki me dustbin mein aag laga di hai. Girl, when Rekha ji throws something in the dustbin, 4 spot boys uspe pani dalte hai. Nahi to set pe khade logon ki aahon se shama bujh jaati hain. What the hell was I thinking with that foooh? Then maine chappal maar-maar ke aag bhujai. Poetry, sophistication and ambience died a suffocating death.

Ladies and gents, aur yeh hai wo do karamjali mombattiyan!

Because my family and friends read all my posts to keep a check on me, after this update - candles ko ta-ta bol de, Basanti.