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Wednesday, October 11, 2017

I deleted your number which, by the way, I remember by heart



Anger. It makes you do stupid thing. I was so angry last night, I deleted your number from my phone. But that was not enough. I picked up the phone again and I unfriended you on Facebook. I unfollowed you on Twitter and Instagram. I blocked you on WhatsApp as well. 'I am done!' I told myself.


I picked up the book I was reading and pretended to read. I was on the same page for 5 minutes. Words were blurry but your thoughts were clear. Very clear! I picked my phone, again. Searched for you on Facebook. I hated your profile picture. 'You snob!' I cursed. Then, I read your timeline. I read each post. I read between lines too - how you always posted a smiley while replying to girls - that made me boil with anger. The moment this realization struck, I blocked you on Facebook. I was officially done with you!


I turned sides on the bed. Confused, I recalled some best and worst times we had together. Few made me smile. Few, very few, affirmed that no matter how much I try, I can't masquerade my feelings. I love you - that's a fact. By this time, anger was subsiding and gentle waves of love were making their way. My body felt light. Slowly logic triggered. I told myself to act mature. I told myself if love is an ocean, I want to swim, surf, dive and drown with you. Without you, I may not get angry this often, but I will be very lonely. And I choose anger over loneliness!


P. S. - I deleted your number which, by the way, I remember by heart.



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9 comments:

  1. Love. And you do know a thing about it don't you? Perhaps its all about how you express it. In a way that's so easy to connect.
    Have a very happy in love Diwali Saru.

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  2. Saru you surprise me each time with the range of your writing ! Wishing more power to WORDS this Diwali

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  3. The fluctuations of feelings expressed so beautifully ....

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  4. Aapne to sabki feelings ko paper per utar diya hai, gusse me sabke sath yehi hota hai 👍👍

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  5. Woohoo! You nailed it Saru and very engrossing that makes for an engaging tale in novels. How feeling fluctuate over time! Emotions tapped with sheer competence. The story of so many of us.

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  6. written so many emotions so simply yet beautifully :)

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  7. :) zillions of emotions in just few words... only you could do.

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